dyshanhics

hello my name is hanh and this is my blog.
that's the only intro you'll get.

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My bf, Mr. Man T., is a master chef in disguise of a jeweler. Since he hasn't been able to bestow his cooking abilities lately he has outsourced his gianormous talents in cooking on me. Me, who has not cooked a single dish (besides eggs/instant noodles/beef & [insert vegetable here]) for 24 years of my existing life. Me, who burnt the one time I tried to cook chicken fried steak. Me, who only made cake out of a box (woot). Me.

My mom has told me numerous times that I will never be able to cook for my husband which made me insist on finding a husband who would be able to cook for me. (So far I am on track.)

Anyway, since I'm as n00b as you can get with cooking, I thought I'd share some hard dishes in an easy to do way for anyone who likes living on the edge of a butcher knife for once.

Hanh trying to cook take 4.5

Bun Bo Hue! Translated: Noodles Beef Hue (city in Vietnam)!

Elements:
Beef Shank (2-5lbs depending how much meat you likey)
Bun Bo Hue Powder 1 (ask the Asian Market lady)
Onion 1
Lemongrass 4 (ask the Asian Market lady)
Garlic (lots)
Pig leg (2-4 legs depending how much pig legs you likey)
Shrimp sauce in brine 1 jar (ask the Asian Market lady)
MSG (if you want your mother to yell at you)
Chicken Broth 4 cans
Rice Vermicelli 2 packages

Shrimp chips 1 bag (to eat while you're prepping)

For the rest of the ingredients I will assume you have in your kitchen... if not I give you this face -_-

The rest is going to go really fast cuz details suck and all the n00bs know that we'll lose interest if it seems to complicated in 5 nano seconds so ready set, go!

Take two pots, one medium size (enough to fit your pig legs) and one b i g (for the broth).
Boil both separately.

Rub salt on your pig legs, like you're massaging oil on a fat lady's thighs.
Medium water comes to boil, throw pig legs in. Take out after 20 mins after water boils up again.
Meanwhile slice up your beef. This shit is hard, you must have a sharp knife. If you don't go out and buy one. Now. or ask your neighbor.
Slice..
Slice..
Slice..

Put the sliced meat up in a big bowl. Slice up a whole onion and add that too.
Also throw in Shrimp sauce like 6 big spoon fulls, don't go cheap on that shit.
Take the bottom of the lemongrass (the whitish part) and about 8 cloves of garlic. Put it in a food processor and chop it up. Add that with the beef as well.
3-4 tablespoons of sugar
1 tablespoon of pepper
2 tablespoons of msg (again, if you want your mom to yell at you)
6-7 sprites of fish sauce. No fish sauce?! Asian market lady.
Add one packet of bun bo hue powder

(all numbers are estimates cuz I won't know how much meat ya'll will use. Anyway, less is better (for now) you can always add flavor after the fact. Man I feel so smart right now...

By this time your pig legs should be done, take that shit out and rinse with cold water. Then drop it in with your chicken broth. Add a can of water too.

Fry the meat in a big pan or pot. Fry your meat for about 10-15 minutes. Dump it into the chicken broth
Boil for 1 1/2 hours.
Take one lemongrass and bash the bottom of it. Throw that in the pot.
Cook for another 30 minutes.

Cook your rice vermicelli... uh follow directions on the bag (its kinda like spaghetti)


Put rice vermicelli in a bowl. Pour broth over bowl. Add green onions, cilantro and bean sprouts.




Eat that shit with chopsticks.
Cry from the spiciness and that you've made one of the most popular Vietnamese dishes. Ever.

Damage:

4 Hours (includes shopping time)
Approx 30. dollars (feeds 10+ ppl)
Your mom yelling at you for using msg (and perhaps chicken broth from a can)
Tears from cutting an onion
Food coma

Enjoy!

hanh.